I haven’t written in a minute. It could be because I’m lazy. It could be because life is…life, or it could be because I haven’t felt The Push™.

It was always about The Push for me. It’s how I was wired – or so I thought. Whether it was The Push of a manic-like state of motivation, The Push of an approaching deadline, or even The Push of guilt or necessity – The Push fueled me and sometimes I felt myself relying a little too heavily on it to take any action at all. The trouble is, I think The Push has caught on to me lately. I don’t feel its force as often. I don’t feel its weight or urgency, which means I’ve been left with my own devices to make decisions – big or small. And that’s pretty scary for a person like me – a person who made a lot of QUESTIONABLE (bad) decisions in college and has in turn destroyed most of the photos of myself from that time.

Now that The Push has taken a step back, I can’t say I’m alone. Because where The Push once stood, loud and boisterous, taking up a large corner of my brain, now stands a smaller entity. It’s gentle and soft spoken and even a little elusive. This…is The Whisper.

Where The Push is the sound of a train coming at you at 200 mph, making every nerve in your body vibrate, The Whisper is your mom quietly opening your bedroom curtains, so you can slowly wake up in the morning. The Whisper has the ability to plant seeds and quietly tends to those seeds when I’m not paying any attention, allowing thoughtful and intentional ideas to grow from them. The Whisper isn’t assertive or panicked, but it’s calm and steady – allowing me to think I’m building thoughts and connecting dots all on my own until I’m ready to use them in my life.

The Whisper has helped me a lot this last year, and a lot of big changes occurred because of it. Not only did the changes happen, they happened in the right way. The Whisper allowed me to slow down and not feel the urgency or panic that The Push had conditioned me to for so long.

The Whisper helped me make a big decision regarding my career and gave me the confidence to take a leap of faith. More importantly, The Whisper reminded me that the decision wasn’t really about just my career – it was about my life. It was about my children, my time and my relationships – with others and with myself. The things The Push wouldn’t have considered, The Whisper made a priority. 

I’m not sure where The Whisper comes from. Is it myself? My intuition? My wisdom? Have I really matured to a point where I can say I even have “wisdom”? Maybe…Or maybe it’s a Higher Power – THE Higher Power, who knows we all need the guidance of a little voice to give us that slow and steady pep talk. To remind us what our strengths are, and more importantly to remind us to work on our weaknesses.

Whatever it came from, I’m glad it’s here now, making things so much clearer with its quiet, steady demeanor. Making me consider the outcomes and making me understand consequences and a deeper meaning of my decisions.

Deep down, I think it always may have been there. A balanced and consistent force, not pausing its mission even though it was time and time again muffled by the confidence (and sometimes ignorance) of The Push. I’m grateful it didn’t stop trying. I’m grateful its consistency created a vibration that became louder than any idea The Push could throw at me.

Life somehow seems better listening to The Whisper rather than getting taken off guard by The Push.

If you haven’t heard it yet, just listen a little harder. It’s there. Slow and steady, quiet and gentle, waiting for The Push to take a breath so it can give you an unmistakable sign. You just have to be ready to hear it.